I finally know what it’s like. All those things people say about what it means to really be in love, how people lord over it as a concept and put these really tight constraints on what it means to be in love- I get it. I can see why people would gatekeep a feeling like this. It feels like a crime to dilute it and allow lesser emotions any stage presence. It makes sense, finally.

I think working on my blog is a damned neat hobby. The result looks like a well-oiled machine even though I don’t know how to make a well-oiled machine. It’s just super cool. I just wrote my last post detailing how I automatically generate webp thumbnails for every markdown image I use in blog posts. Not gonna lie- Hugo is fucking amazing. It’s blazing fast, easy to understand, relatively few bugs, and does exactly what you expect it to (within the confines of expecting Go Html Template).

Here, have a couple memes.

This was a tough nut to crack. I’m totally new to Go Html Templates and Go itself, and I’ve never really used anything outside of Jekyll. It took me a minute, but I wound up coming up with this:

{{ $image := (resources.Get .Destination) }}
{{ with $image }}
    {{ if eq $image.MediaType.SubType "svg" }}
        <a data-fancybox="image" href="{{ $image.RelPermalink }}" data-caption="{{ with $.Title }}{{ . }}{{ end }}">
            <img src="{{ $image.RelPermalink }}" {{ with $.Text }} alt="{{ . }}" {{ end }} {{ with $.Title}} title="{{ . }}"{{ end }} />
        </a>
    {{ else }}
        {{ $resize := .Fill "200x165 webp q80" }}
        <a data-fancybox="image" href="{{ $image.RelPermalink }}" data-caption="{{ with $.Title }}{{ . }}{{ end }}">
            <img src="{{ $resize.RelPermalink }}" {{ with $.Text }} alt="{{ . }}" {{ end }} {{ with $.Title}} title="{{ . }}"{{ end }} />
        </a>
    {{ end }}
{{ end }}

Apparently I have a *.svg file on my blog somewhere, because that was a thing I had to catch right away for this to work. So I had to move all my images out of static and into assets for it to work, first of all. Then I had to figure out how to query a parent context, so I could fill in Text and Title with the images. That’s what the $ is in $.Text. It’s the parent context outside of $image.

BEHOLD! A dump of maymays!

Oh man. Holy shit. If you haven’t seen this I consider you to be incredibly lucky. When I stumbled upon this “Federal Postal Court” nonsense I really couldn’t figure out what the fuck I was reading. This shit is absolutely fucking bananas.

: Russell-Jay: Gould.

I just don’t know where to start with this loon. He claims he has some mystical understanding of grammar and syntax that is “universally understood” as “mathematically supported”. I honestly can’t type enough quotes to encapsulate these absolutely asinine claims. I just can’t even with this guy. This is easily the dumbest shit I’ve stumbled upon in a very long time. And he’s an actively seeking con-man, too. He’s currently bilking anyone dumb enough to give him money a few hundred dollars per “claim of the life”.

My theme apparently wraps every ![Image](source) in another set of <a href=""></a> tags that point to the source for the image. If you’re trying to generate galleries with a shortcode using fancyboxes, this default behavior is going to bite you in the ass. I forced the behavior to what I want/expect by copying assets/js/even.js and assets/js/main.js from themes/even into my blog root assets/js/. Then I hacked out the fancyboxes references in both files and regenerated. Boom, galleries work, and I didn’t lose anything of value in any previous posts. It’s a win/win for my specific situation.

BEHOLD, FUCKING MEMES.

God damn, this thing is really flexible. Just added a layouts/shortcodes/gallery.html and slapped a little Go Html Template and some lightbox.js and whatever, and bing-o bang-o boom; motherfucker is an autogallery. BOOYAH, BITCH.

Cool as fuck.

Of course there’s a little more to it than that. Gotta do some page bundling as well, which is easy enough. Just run your hugo new post/2022-01-01-Title/index.md and dump your images into content/post/2022-01-01-Title/img.

I’m sure churning the posts out, boy howdy. Treating this sumbitch like Facebook. Except this is way better than Facebook. I’m the master here, no one else. Nobody else gets to determine what I am and am not allowed to post here except for me. It’s very empowering and feels pretty awesome, and as long as you practice rational operational security you’re golden- Even if you piss off half the internet.