Caffeine might be the most nefarious thing we humans have normalized. What a drug, right? It makes you feel like you’re exercising just being stationary. It increases your sitting heart rate. It gives you a burst of energy. It also strongly counteracts feelings of tiredness.

Well, those are the good things about caffeine. The negative points are all over the map, though. They range from the inconvenience of existing without caffeine for a day to the worst migraine you’ve ever experienced when you try to quit cold turkey.

If you’re ever trying to quit caffeine, don’t do cold turkey. There’s no reason for it. If you have a headache, just have eight ounces of a caffeinated soda or tea. It won’t be enough to make your heart explode, but it will be enough to satisfy the need your body has for it.

There seems to be less heart attack risk with coffee than energy drinks, so I’m switching back to the brown stuff. It ain’t the best tasting bean in the world, but it keeps me from dying at least.